Can you hear a heart break?

Can you hear a heart break? I think maybe you can.  I have a story to share with you.  10 years ago, almost to the day …. Mick and I joined a new Growth Group.  This was a powerful group, certainly not our peers.  These were “seasoned” Christians, they knew the bible, knew scripture, debated points and at times challenged the teaching pastors!!  Are you even allowed to do that??  We were “baby” Christians and honestly, they sort of freaked us out but we soaked it up.  Within the group were Tom and Barbara.  They are some 10+ years our seniors.  Barbara is outgoing, caring and sassy. Tom is quiet, serious and witty. Six months after we met them, we went thru a serious financial hit.  One day we came home to a simple card with an “anonymous” $500 check to bless us and help us thru.  This was our first experience with Christian grace. We were somewhat dumbfounded that someone would just send us $500.  They told us when we were back on our feet to just pass it on.  Over the years, we have passed it on many, many times over.

Plus, the following summer as our situation improved and God was prompting us into ministry, we took $500 of seed money and began the military ministry at North Coast Church, which we lead for almost 10 years.  It is now a thriving ministry of over 800 adults both local and overseas. Before we launched the ministry, we went to Tom and Barbara and asked for their blessing and asked if they would support us in the ministry.  For 10 years Barbara led Military wives bible studies and attended events and for 10 years Tom came to almost every event, made coffee, empty trash and did KP duty.

A quick note on Barbara.  Over the years, I have grown to love, admire and most importantly rely on Barbara.  She is a friend, a mentor and my wise counsel.  Two years ago she was diagnosed with Bladder Cancer and went thru multiple procedures and a pretty invasive surgery.  I sat at the hospital with her, prayed with her, questioned her doctors and kept a watchful eye on her nurses. Two years later, she is still cancer free and has adapted to her new norm.

But this story is about Tom. I guess I should have warned you that this might be a bit long.  Tom is a retired Lieutenant Colonel, did I mention that?  Did I mention that the man who quietly, with the most gracious servant’s heart emptied the trash at every military breakfast is a retired Lieutenant Colonel? My father was a career Marine.  He was just a career Marine that had his career cut short.  He died in Viet Nam in 1965, when I was 5.  He was 32.  He was a Captain. For you Marines – he was a Mustang.  I don’t remember his voice.  I don’t remember his smell, his walk, his mannerisms, his laugh or even his temper.  I don’t remember him.  But as I have grown to know Tom, I have grown to hope that this is the type is man my father would have been.  A man of character, of integrity, of grace, a man of God and a man for God.  A man who serves with a quiet heart.  I don’t know if I’ve ever heard Tom call me by name.  He always calls me “sweet girl.”  I’m sure he calls others the same, but I choose to think this is reserved for me only.

Recently, Tom was diagnosed with MDS (myelodysplastic syndrome.)  MDS is a bone marrow disorder where the bone marrow doesn't produce enough healthy blood cells. Simply, it’s cancer of the blood.  It is the precursor to the worst kind of Leukemia. He started chemo on Labor Day. The chemo will not cure the MDS, it may not even slow it down.  It is only an effort to keep it from moving to Acute Leukemia. Quite simply, to survive, Tom has to have a bone marrow transplant - sooner than later.

This is the part where I boldly and unabashedly ask you to consider being tested to be a donor.  Testing to be a donor is as simple as swab in the mouth.  It puts you in the National Registry to save a life….not just Tom’s life, but any life. In another week, Tom’s bone marrow “chaser” will be in the registry every day looking for a match, maybe and prayerfully yours! Donating can be as simple as a very-long version of giving blood. 70% of all patients in need of bone marrow transplants must find a matching donor outside of their family.  Without the transplant, they will die.  Without the transplant, I will lose my friend.  I will never again see him selflessly serve, I won’t get to serve him Father’s Day brunch on my patio, I won’t hear his laugh and he won’t call me sweet girl.  What is the sound of a heart breaking?  It is losing a second father. It is the sound of a tear hitting the floor.

Bone Marrow Drive (only requirement is 18-45 years old)
Saturday, September 26
10am – 3pm
Parking Lot next to Chick Fil A – Oceanside
3475 Marron Rd, Oceanside, CA 92056

If you are not in the area – go the Nation Registry – you can test on behalf of Tom Turner:
https://bethematch.org or  http://www.deletebloodcancer.org

Any questions, ask me:  deb.bostwick@gmail.com